That's when questions like, “Is it okay to ask a friend to throw a shower for me?” start cropping up.
Etiquette wise, it's a bad idea. In all honesty, no one is required to throw a baby shower for anybody. A baby shower is a gift given to you and either you have one or you don't. However, if you do really want to have one, there are some ways to go about it so you don't strain any friendships or wallets!
One way to do it is to drop hints. There is usually a problem where friends don't want to take responsibility because they think that one or the other is hosting the baby shower. Or, they want it to be a surprise so they don't say anything at all.
Very subtle hints like, “I'm thinking of registering at this store because I just realized that I only have a few weeks to go before I give birth” or posting “Just X weeks to go before D-day!” on Facebook or Twitter may get things going. Pregnancy might seem like forever for the expectant mommy, but it's just a short while to friends. Some may not even realize that you're nearing the end of your term.
If you're very close to your friends, you may be comfortable about asking, “Is anyone throwing a baby shower for me?” That could lead to planning the baby shower since they may not know when you'd be free to talk about it. Just be careful when you know your friends are watching their wallets and you really want a dream baby shower.
The only kosher thing to do is foot part of the bill. It's a gift after all, and you don't want your friends to put out more than they can afford for you! So if they can give you a bare-bones baby shower (with which there is nothing wrong) and you want to sprinkle a little more bling into it, then offer to pay for it yourself. The baby shower is not about collecting as many gifts as you can, it's about knowing which of your friends are there for you in times like this.
Of course when you go this way, you will not be letting anyone know that you spent for any part of the celebration. That's between you and your friends and you should also let them take the part of the hostess as well.
And what if you still don't have a hostess after all of this? Then
host the baby shower yourself but don't call it a shower anymore.
Have a “Celebrate the End of Pregnancy!” party or “The
End of the Ninth Month-sary” and gather all your friends together.
You will definitely get some gifts without even asking for them
since the hint on the theme is clear enough.